About a year ago I was sitting at work, in this job I had no idea how to do, freshly separated from my husband, in a new town with new people at my own big wooden desk with this massive computer monitor in my face. I found myself with a moment of spare time – when my mind tends to get antsy – so I decided to see if I still remembered how to write in cursive. I remember doing so in school but that was 10 years ago. My fresh new Pilot G-2 pen was itching to write so I started to scribble random words on a piece of scratch paper. This was a refreshing little pause in my day. Not worrying about anything, but just trying to loop and swirl to the best of my knowledge. It became a daily routine when I would find myself with a silent phone and no fires burning around me. Random words became trains of thought. I filled page after page of discussing what to make for dinner or what really makes me such a fan of my trusty 07 point pens. Eventually things would come up in my random train of thought that would stop me cold. Babbling on about coffee would bring about revelations of moments I truly felt peaceful. Yammering on about the people around me would cause me to turn inward to my own person.
Thus began my re-discovery of journaling. I kept it up for as long as I kept that job, around 6 months, until a stupid decision caused me to take pause from it for a while. That’s a story for another time. For now, I know that I could use a little bit of guidance from my own mental processing and rather than cause my book shelf to fill up with even more bulging notebooks of scribbles and thoughts, I’ve moved to the shiny new (to me) internet blogging world.
My goal is to choose a subject to dive into with each entry, rather than my usual rambles. I have a shelf full of rambles. Here’s where I can put it together in a nice little Cliff’s Notes version.
I have absolutely no idea what I’m doing but maybe I’ll thank myself in time.