So I know there are a ton of tests out there to figure out who the hell you are. Deep down you know, but it’s nice to get someone else’s stance on the subject. Receiving validation does wonders. I went around for years with a popping jaw and occasionally it would turn to the most intensely painful head/jaw/teeth/neck pain that it would leave me debilitated for days, unable to eat or even talk. Finally I went to see a TMJ specialist and lo and behold, one side of my jaw is a few centimeters higher than the other, meaning that for the rest of my life I’m going to have to stay away from gum and overly-chewy foods (goodbye jerky), never fully put my teeth together when my face is resting, double up on my intake of certain vitamins, and visit an emergency room every once in a while for some strong pain meds when my head decides to randomly cave in. It sucks but being able to get validation from a professional that I’m not making the pain up, and the issue REALLY DOES EXIST made it a million times easier to live with.
Taking this 16 personalities test (www.16personalities.com) led me to the result that I have an INTJ personality (apparently only 0.8% of women are this so just take a look at this diamond in the rough, folks!) and it’s summed up this way ‘– it is often a challenge for them to find like-minded individuals who are able to keep up with their relentless intellectualism and chess-like maneuvering. People with the INTJ personality type are imaginative yet decisive, ambitious yet private, amazingly curious, but they do not squander their energy.‘ I took one look at this and was like ‘Holy crap, tell me more about me!’
Now there is no way that all people with one result are all the same, but a lot of the description they had for everything made so much sense to me.. Things that I realized about myself but didn’t know how to vocalize. Feeling like I’m in an emotional slump right now makes me want to look back at it. (Now there’s a good example of how I work – like a Christian turning to a Bible for answers, I turn to science and research to help discover myself. Hah!) I want to share how it makes sense to me, how I work, for my own sake or anyone else who’d like to know how others work so I want to share some excerpts that I found quite relevant and expand on the ideas.
‘A paradox to most observers, INTJs are able to live by glaring contradictions that nonetheless make perfect sense – at least from a purely rational perspective. For example, INTJs are simultaneously the most starry-eyed idealists and the bitterest of cynics, a seemingly impossible conflict. But this is because INTJ types tend to believe that with effort, intelligence and consideration, nothing is impossible, while at the same time they believe that people are too lazy, short-sighted or self-serving to actually achieve those fantastic results.’
Yes yes yes a million times yes! This explains why I can like or even love someone so deeply but still claim to hate people in general. There are PERSONS that I like but people? Lemmings. I know that the world is crap. It is. Every day brings new challenges and obstacles, shitty people, shitty luck.. There are times that things are just absolute shit and that’s unavoidable. The bright side of this? It helps you appreciate the good so much more. For me, being inspired is a feeling second only to love (which should include inspiration as well, in my opinion) and the only way to truly feel inspiration is to be optimistic and honestly believe that good can happen. There’s a very high chance it won’t, but damnit, I still have hope. Good things do still happen every now and again. You just have to be aware enough to recognize it.
‘Rules, limitations and traditions are anathema to the INTJ personality type – everything should be open to questioning and reevaluation, and if they see a way, INTJs will often act unilaterally to enact their technically superior, sometimes insensitive, and almost always unorthodox methods and ideas.’
I am always observing. I want to know why things are the way they are and in order to do that I need to be able to look at things through as many perspectives as I can. I could find a way to speak from anyone’s point of view to defend their reasoning behind an action, good or bad, to make it understandable – because that’s the only way to really know what was going through the person’s head and how they really felt when the act occurred. Maybe I should have been a lawyer. Because I take such an outsider’s point of view of everything, my advice is sometimes taken unkindly. I warn anyone that I know that they are always welcome to ask my advice or opinion on anything but they may not like the answer. I love good honest deep talk and I’m a great listener but if you ask my honest opinion on something I will be very blunt and it may not be what you want to hear. I don’t care who you are. I will be supportive of those I love no matter what but it doesn’t mean that I will show support for something I think is wrong.
‘INTJs can see things from many perspectives. INTJs use their creativity and imagination not so much for artistry, but for planning contingencies and courses of action for all possible scenarios.’
While I do also use my imagination for artistry in my spare time, I also agree with the rest of this. If I get a single inkling that something is amiss with a situation, my logic side will take over and I will consider all of the options at hand before I move forward.
‘INTJs trust their rationalism above all else, so when they come to a conclusion, they have no reason to doubt their findings. This creates an honest, direct style of communication that isn’t held back by perceived social roles or expectations.’
Again, I will remain open-minded and would love to hear your take on my thoughts of something but do not try to sway me if I feel strongly about it. If my opinion changes it will only be due to solid facts and discoveries, not by someone’s attempt to convince me. Throw some facts at me but let it be my choice to change my views.
‘Either an idea is the most rational or it’s wrong, and INTJs will apply this to their arguments as well as their own behavior, staying calm and detached from these sometimes emotionally charged conflicts.’
Go ahead and get worked up. I’ll be over here, cool as a cucumber, confident in my stance.
‘INTJs are incredibly efficient, and if tasks meet the criteria of furthering a goal, they will find a way to consolidate and accomplish those tasks. However, this drive for efficiency can also lead to a sort of elaborate laziness, wherein INTJs find ways to bypass seeming redundancies which don’t seem to require a great deal of thought – this can be risky, as sometimes double-checking one’s work is the standard for a reason.’
Yes, yes, but I swear I go over everything I type as I go. It’s more efficient that way. I did the same thing in grade school. All of my drafts of a paper would be the exact same thing re-written in pen and then typed up. *Efficiency*
‘All this rationalism leads to a very intellectually receptive personality type, as INTJs stay open to new ideas, supported by logic, even if (and sometimes especially if) they prove INTJs’ previous conceptions wrong. When presented with unfamiliar territory, such as alternate lifestyles, INTJs tend to apply their receptiveness and independence, and aversion to rules and traditions, to these new ideas as well, resulting in fairly liberal social senses.’
There is no way I could have worded that better. Brava!
‘Combined with their irreverence for social conventions, INTJs can be brutally insensitive in making their opinions of others all too clear.’
Guilty. Again, fair warning if you ever ask for my opinion on something.
‘INTJs tend to have complete confidence in their thought process, because rational arguments are almost by definition correct – at least in theory. In practice, emotional considerations and history are hugely influential, and a weak point for INTJs is that they brand these factors and those who embrace them as illogical, dismissing them and considering their proponents to be stuck in some baser mode of thought, making it all but impossible to be heard.’
Yes, I am judge-y and I try not to be. If you can catch my attention with something that will really change the way I see a subject, that’s awesome.. but if you use some archaic old way of reasoning (especially if it involves religious influence) it all turns into white noise for me.
‘A recurring theme with INTJs is their analytical prowess, but this strength can fall painfully short where logic doesn’t rule – such as with human relationships. When their critical minds and sometimes neurotic level of perfectionism (often the case with Turbulent INTJs) are applied to other people, all but the steadiest of friends will likely need to make some distance, too often permanently.’
I guess this explains why I’ve got a ton of ‘facebook friends’ but hardly anyone I actually talk to. I study in silence but don’t make an effort to reach out. I will always care but only fully for one or a few at a time. It’s cold. I’m sorry. It’s just the way I work.
‘Blindly following precedents and rules without understanding them is distasteful to INTJs, and they disdain even more authority figures who blindly uphold those laws and rules without understanding their intent. Anyone who prefers the status quo for its own sake, or who values stability and safety over self-determination, is likely to clash with INTJ personality types. ‘
The status is not quo. When you make a law or rule based off of your own insecurities (or religious mumbo jumbo) that does real emotional or physical harm to someone that you simply don’t agree with, that is not okay and I will never support it.
‘This antipathy to rules and tendency to over-analyze and be judgmental, even arrogant, all adds up to a personality type that is often clueless in dating. Having a new relationship last long enough for INTJs to apply the full force of their analysis on their potential partner’s thought processes and behaviors can be challenging. Trying harder in the ways that INTJs know best can only make things worse, and it’s unfortunately common for them to simply give up the search. Ironically, this is when they’re at their best, and most likely to attract a partner.’
Exactly where I’m at in this moment. Am I attractive now?
This is going to take a while, as I want to dive deeper into more ways that my personality affects my life. Time for a blog entry with -dun dun dun- ~*Multiple Parts*~